There’s a particular kind of exhaustion that sets in when you’ve spent your day pouring out—whether that’s wiping sticky faces, walking someone through heartbreak, mentoring a younger soul, or just trying to keep everyone fed (physically or spiritually).

You give so much. You care so deeply.
And still, at the end of the day, you sit down and hear that voice in your head say:

“You didn’t do enough.”

“You should’ve handled that better.”

“You’re falling short.”

Whether you’re mothering in the literal or spiritual sense, the ache is the same: you feel like a failure.
And the voice in your head narrates your worst moments like it’s auditioning for a guilt-themed podcast.

But what if that voice isn’t telling the truth?

What if feeling like a failure isn’t proof that you’re not cut out for this—but an invitation to re-anchor yourself in what’s actually true?

What if peace doesn’t come from trying harder… but from returning to the One who calls you beloved—even here?

Below are three Catholic mindset resets—tools to gently interrupt the spiral, invite grace in, and remind you who you are (and whose you are) when it all feels like too much.

#1: Practice the Examen backwards

How many times have you sat down at the end of the day only to hear your brain knock and say, “Hey, I noticed you were trying to relax. Instead, would you like to relive everything you did wrong today? I made us a color-coded list!” 

So many of us only look for what went wrong in our day. And over time, that trains our brains to expect failure. It reinforces shame and traps us in a loop where we see every flaw and miss all the grace.

But what if we flipped the script?

What if—before rehearsing the mess—we practiced the Ignatian Examen backwards?

Instead of starting with, “Where did I fall short?” we ask,

• Where was God loving me today?
• What didn’t fall apart—even though it could have?
• What grace showed up when I wasn’t even looking?

You can still be honest about the hard. But when you begin with love, you anchor the story in truth—not shame. This rewrites failure in light of God’s presence, not your performance.

#2: Skip the affirmations and breath a truth instead

Don’t get us wrong, we love a good affirmation and believe they can really help rewire your brain, AND sometimes they feel hollow when you’re drowning in guilt and feel like you’re ruining everything. 

Instead, tie your breath to divine truth. God never lies to us. His Word is always true. 

Here are some examples:

Inhale: “You are near to the brokenhearted…”

Exhale: “…and You save the crushed in spirit.” (Psalm 34:18)

Inhale: “The Lord your God is in your midst…”

Exhale: “…He will renew you in His love.” (Zephaniah 3:17)

Inhale: “You hem me in…”

Exhale: “…behind and before.” (Psalm 139:5)

Inhale: “My people will dwell in a peaceful home…”

Exhale: “…in quiet resting places.” (Isaiah 32:18)

These aren’t just calming phrases—they’re anchors. You don’t have to fake peace. You can breathe it in—one promise at a time.

#3: Put on a physical mantle

Have you ever noticed that a small child having a tantrum will stop what they’re doing if you start Sometimes your mind is too noisy for words. That’s when your body can preach the truth for you.

When the guilt is loud or the day has unraveled, grab a shawl, cardigan, or even a towel (We know this sounds weird but it works wonders). Wrap it around your shoulders or lay it across your head, then pray: “Mary, cover me in your mantle. I need your calm. I need your strength. Teach me to carry on with grace.”

This small act is what’s called an embodied prayer—a way to use your physical senses to anchor spiritual reality. You are physically claiming a truth you might struggle to feel in the moment: that you are covered, protected, and not alone.

We know it sounds a little make-believe, but this is deeply Catholic.

The Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC 2702) affirms this beautifully: “The need to involve the senses in interior prayer corresponds to a requirement of our human nature. We are body and spirit, and we experience the need to translate our feelings externally. We must pray with our whole being to give all power possible to our supplication.”

In other words: you were made to pray with your body, too. The sign of the Cross, kneeling, bowing, lighting candles, touching holy water—our faith is full of tactile ways to participate in grace. So next time the inner storm hits, let your body remind your soul: I am wrapped in mercy. I am clothed in strength. I am not carrying this alone.

BONUS: Pray the Litany of Humility

Sometimes what feels like failure is actually wounded pride. We think we’re upset because we yelled, or we forgot the diaper bag, or bedtime went off the rails again—but often, the real sting comes from the story underneath:

I shouldn’t struggle like this.
Other moms probably don’t lose it like I do.
If I were stronger, holier, better—I wouldn’t be here again.

But that’s not humility. That’s pride in disguise. And pride doesn’t bring peace. It keeps us stuck in performance, perfectionism, and comparison.

That’s why the Litany of Humility is such a powerful reset. Written by Cardinal Rafael Merry del Val, it’s incredibly humbling:

O Jesus, meek and humble of heart,

Hear me.

From the desire of being esteemed,

Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the desire of being loved,

Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the desire of being extolled,

Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the desire of being honored,

Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the desire of being praised,

Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the desire of being preferred to others,

Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the desire of being consulted,

Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the desire of being approved,

Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the fear of being humiliated,

Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the fear of being despised,

Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the fear of suffering rebukes,

Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the fear of being calumniated,

Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the fear of being forgotten,

Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the fear of being ridiculed,

Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the fear of being wronged,

Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the fear of being suspected,

Deliver me, O Jesus.

That others may be loved more than I,

Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be esteemed more than I,

Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That, in the opinion of the world, others may increase and I may decrease,

Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be chosen and I set aside,

Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be praised and I go unnoticed,

Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be preferred to me in everything,

Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should,

Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

You’ll be surprised how quickly peace rushes in when you stop clinging to who you think you should be—and start letting God love you as you are.

Now what?

Feeling like a failure isn’t a sign that you’re falling apart.
It’s often a sign that your heart is aching for truth.

Not the truth that shames you—but the truth that frees you.

The truth that says:
You are not your worst moment.
You are not behind.
You are not disqualified.
You are beloved—still called, still chosen, still held.

These mindset resets aren’t just cute tips—they’re ways to live in the reality of who God says you are. But sometimes, we need more than a few tools. We need a full re-grounding.

If you’ve been living under the weight of false identities—“not enough,” “too much,” “failure,” “mess”—we created something for you.

It’s called Who You Say I Am: A Catholic Identity Retreat, and it’s designed to walk you step-by-step out of the lies and back into the truth of who you are in Christ.

This 5-day, at-home audio and journaling retreat is for you, a busy Catholic woman ready to reclaim your identity in Christ, renew your purpose every day, and embrace your motherhood with peace and joy. 

Each day, you’ll receive…

🧠 A quick, practical mindset audio to help you understand why you feel stuck and give you practical, actionable tools so you can show up with more patience, confidence, and calm. 

♥️ A short, powerful theology audio to reveal who you are in God’s eyes—so you can anchor yourself in His truth, silence the lies, and carry His strength through even the hardest days. 

😍 A beautifully designed printable workbook with simple exercises and reflections to help you integrate what you’re learning into daily life—so you can show up with more peace, confidence, and joy faster. 
🙏🏼 A daily prayer + Visio Divina exercise to deepen your connection with God and rediscover His presence in your motherhood.

We have two versions: one for mothers and one for spiritual mothers——because no matter your season, this truth still holds:

You are loved. You are called. You are His.
Let this be the week you finally believe it.